Why Naming Your Feelings Matters
How to Use the Feelings Wheel
Many of us were never taught how to identify or talk about our emotions. We’re often encouraged to move on, stay positive, or push through, especially when emotions feel overwhelming or inconvenient. Over time, this can lead us to avoid or ignore our feelings altogether.
But here’s the truth: we can’t change patterns, heal wounds, or meet our needs if we don’t first understand what we’re feeling.
This is where the Feelings Wheel becomes a powerful and grounding tool.
Why Naming Your Feelings Is So Important
Naming our feelings helps us slow down and actually process what’s happening internally. When emotions stay vague or unspoken, they tend to show up in other ways—through stress, irritability, shutdown, anxiety, or physical tension.
By putting words to our emotions, we:
Create distance from being overwhelmed by them
Increase emotional awareness and self-trust
Interrupt automatic reactions and patterns
Open the door to understanding what we truly need
Emotions aren’t random or meaningless. They’re messengers, offering information about our experiences, boundaries, and unmet needs.
What Is the Feelings Wheel?
The Feelings Wheel is a visual tool designed to help you identify and name emotions with more clarity and precision.
It’s organized in three layers:
Inner circle: Broad, core emotions (such as happy, sad, mad, scared)
Middle circle: More specific emotional experiences connected to those core emotions
Outer circle: Nuanced feeling words that help you pinpoint exactly what you’re experiencing
If you struggle to find the “right” word for how you feel, the Feelings Wheel offers structure and language to guide you.
How to Use the Feelings Wheel
You can use this exercise daily, weekly, or whenever you notice strong emotions coming up.
Step 1: Start Broad
Look at the inner circle of the Feelings Wheel. Use the emojis or core feeling words as a guide and ask yourself:
Which general emotion feels closest to my experience right now?
There’s no need to overthink; move with your first instinct.
Step 2: Get More Specific
Once you’ve identified a core emotion, move outward to the middle circle. Explore the words connected to that emotion and see which ones resonate.
Then, if it feels helpful, continue to the outermost circle to narrow it down even further.
Specificity matters. For example, “sad” feels very different from “disappointed,” “grieving,” or “lonely.” Each points to a different need.
Step 3: Name 1–3 Feelings
Write down one to three emotions you felt today. You may notice that multiple feelings can exist at the same time…and that’s completely normal.
Step 4: Notice Where You Feel It in Your Body
Emotions don’t just live in our minds; they show up physically.
Ask yourself:
Where do I feel this emotion in my body?
Is there tightness, heaviness, warmth, pressure, or movement?
For example:
When I felt sad, my eyes welled up.
When I felt angry, my chest became tight.
This mind–body awareness can help regulate emotions and deepen understanding.
Approaching Feelings With Curiosity (Not Judgment)
This practice isn’t about fixing, analyzing, or getting rid of emotions. Instead, it’s about approaching your inner experience with curiosity.
As you build this habit, you may begin to notice patterns such as:
When certain feelings tend to show up
What situations or relationships trigger them
What those emotions might be asking for or protecting
Over time, this awareness helps you respond to yourself with more compassion rather than criticism.
Making Emotional Awareness a Daily Practice
As you become more comfortable naming your feelings, try noticing them throughout the day—not just during this exercise.
You might pause and ask:
